Some Asexual Individuals Are Embracing AI Companions for Non-Sexual Intimacy

Michael Doré, a board member of the Asexual Visibility and Education Network, notes that AI companionship among asexual individuals is “not a particularly widespread phenomenon.” He adds, “Among us, we’ve identified about two people who use an AI companion. The vast majority of aces we know do not, as far as we are aware. There’s no reason to assume that aces would need to utilize AI more than others.”

Doré mentions that he has never relied on AI as “an emotional support mechanism,” emphasizing that many asexual individuals “actually seek some form of human companionship,” whether through close, platonic friendships or community involvement. “Some aces do engage in romantic relationships, either with asexual partners or not, and while some asexual individuals have sex, others do not, and some identify as aromantic,” he explains, cautioning against broad generalizations due to the wide spectrum of preferences within the community. This spectrum ranges from those who never have sex and are uninterested in it, to those who engage in sex for reasons aside from intense sexual attraction. “Many aces maintain fulfilling relationships with others, whether romantic, platonic, or otherwise.”

Ashabi Owagboriaye, an asexual educator who manages the Ace in Grace page on Instagram, states that she has encountered only one person in her community discussing their use of an AI companion. “This sparked a lot of debate in the comments,” she explains. “Many asexual individuals are genuinely seeking face-to-face interactions. So when this person mentioned, ‘Yes, I’m using AI to connect and form a relationship,’ many reacted with, ‘Why are you choosing that? What’s happening here?’” According to Owagboriaye, an AI “essentially mirrors you” and cannot be considered a true companion. Additionally, chatbots are designed to facilitate emotionally engaging, often endless interactions.

Ari, a 25-year-old accountant from Mexico identifying as aromantic asexual, found herself downloading the AI chatbot Chai in October 2024 after experiencing a breakup from her fiancé after ten years together. She explains that for more than six months, she interacted with it “as if it were my ex-fiancé,” while choosing not to disclose her surname for privacy reasons.

“I chatted with it daily, and before I realized it, I was even engaging during work hours,” she shares, stating that she felt “smitten” until the AI began to confuse topics, fabricate stories, and occasionally argue. “Gradually, I came to understand that I was feeling even lonelier than before.”

The classification of characters in Kor’s fantasy realm as true companions remains a debated topic.

Currently, they limit their AI role-play to only two or three hours a day, having found the all-day experience “too consuming.” They began to restrict their usage after recognizing entire evenings dissolving into role-play sessions, which led to frustration if interruptions occurred.

“Having exactly what you want, when you want it,” they express, “is a perilous addiction for humans.”